Friday, July 22, 2011

Speed 3 or 4

Word on the street is that Sandra Bullock is ready to reprise her star-making turn in Speed in a more literal fashion than usual. Once again she is on board to play Annie Porter (Bullock), a woman whose penchant for moving violations is matched only by her incredibly paradoxical ability to be simultaneously lucky and unlucky in love. Keanu Reeves? Jason Patric? Both are pretty hot. Exploding buses? Out of control cruise lines? Filthy abortion clinics? Terrible romantic nights out! Sources say that, once again, Annie's newest nascent relationship--this time with Robocop (Peter Weller)--will be tested as they are caught in the maelstrom of a seemingly unavoidable disaster. The story takes off as they are in the middle of watching TV, possibly cuddling, when they learn that they are caught in the middle of a booby-trapped universe. If it expands too slowly the gravitational mass of the entire system will be pulled back into itself, crushing everything into a single point in space! If it expands too fast all celestial bodies will eventually disperse themselves so far apart that everything in the Universe will freeze in the absolute cold of deep space! What are they to do? As of press time, sources close to the studio are saying that the script, tentatively titled Speed 3 or 4: The Biggest or Smallest Bang is on page 8 trillion, with filming set to begin in about 300 years

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